Uncrafty Strangers

I was sitting here writing a blog post - thinking to myself, "What the hell am I even talking about?"

And then my phone rang.

A little back story. I am moving on August 1st. I have decided with the upcoming job and a respectable income heading my way - I want to get a place of my own. I have never lived alone before - and think it will be good for me in multiple ways.

I started the apartment hunt a few weeks ago - have reviewed many online and visited two. I had every intent to visit more than 2 - but #2 kicked so much ass that I no longer feel visiting more is necessary.

I visited both 1 and 2 on the same day - within 10 minutes of each other.

I had a meeting scheduled with my boss - and wrote the time down wrong. After waiting for him for a bit, someone came and asked, "what time is your meeting at?"

"It was suppose to start at 11," I told him, around 11:40.

"Yeah - I just checked the calendar. You're not scheduled until 1."

Well I felt like a dummy.

I announced to my colleague that I was going to take this opportunity to go look at a nearby apartment. He says he'll see me at 1.

I got to the place I wanted to see and was greeted by a young lady who gave me the tour did a tour and chatted me up the whole time. Her name was Kelsey. She was very sweet, and did a good job selling the property - but the PROPERTY didn't do a good job selling the property. Not very clean, tiny units, not enough windows. It wasn't terrible - but there was nothing that made me say "Oh! I want to live here!" I was pretty sure this would not be my new home.

After the tour, she took me into the sales office and asked me with the enthusiasm of a Girl-Scout-Cookie vendor, "would you be prepared to sign a lease and put down a deposit right now if we offered you a 10% discount on the rent?"

"No," I told her, casually.

"Is there anything we could do to get you to sign today?"

"I'm not willing to live in an apartment which can only generate tenants by paying them to not consider the competition," I said, matter of factly.

Young Kelsey looked shocked. She scrunched up her nose and broke eye contact for a moment, trying to decide if I had just insulted her. Then her face lit back up - as if she all of a sudden realized my description of their move in special was more accurate than she really wanted it to be.

As she was pulling together some promotional papers to give me, my phone rang. It was the receptionist of a different apartment complex. I have no memory of giving anyone my phone number - but will believe the evidence presented to me.

I told them I was "in a meeting" and would have to call them back.

I realized after calling them, on my drive over, that it was less than a mile from my office. It had grass, trees, and not a single homeless person sleeping in the parking lot. They take me into a unit, and though I don't know the exact square footage - it is very clear that for $20 a month more than the other place, it is more than twice the size.

Lots of windows - a working fire place - washer and dryer in unit. A Porch. A large enough bedroom to make the swinging double doors seem appropriate.

"And we're having a special right now," the tour guide told me. He explains that it is not contingent upon me signing today. I didn't sign right then and there, wanting to give it some thought and consider some other options - but have decided that I will sign on Tuesday when I head to that part of town for our weekly training seminar.

End of backstory.

As I was sitting here, writing a post about our air conditioner breaking last week - my phone rings. It is Kelsey. She asks how my job is going, trys to be chatty. I am polite, but know she is calling to see if she can get me to come in and sign today. I have had this phone call with other apartments before - as well as people trying to sell me credit cards.

"Have you signed a lease for an apartment yet?" she asks.

"No, I have not," I tell her.

"Well I am calling to tell you that if you come in and sign TODAY we can offer you X, Y, and Z!!" (I don't remember what she offered me this time.)

She tells me that this is a one time offer, only if I come in today.

"No thanks - I think I found another place where I'm going to sign next week."

"Oh - well, do you mind if I ask what led you to make that decision?" she asks, trying to sound as cute as possible.

"Sure. It's roughly the same price, roughly twice the square footage, the crime statistics are better, it's closer to my office than your property, and it has a washer and dryer in the unit."

I can only imagine that at this point - Kelsey made the same face she did when I told her I wasn't willing to be bribed.

"Well," she says, dropping the cute tone. "I am glad you found something so perfect!"

"Thanks. Me too," I say. Kelsey is not pleased.

"Is there anything else I can help you with?" she asks, as if I had been the one to make the call.

"Uhh... nope... I think we covered everything."

"Have a great day!" she says, using the cute-voice one last time as she hung up the phone.